Child custody and co-parenting are different for everyone

For couples in New York or elsewhere who have children and decide break up or divorce, figuring out custody and parenting issues can be difficult. Not everyone is able to keep things civil at all times. Even if figuring out a suitable child custody arrangement can be achieved with few issues, parents will still have to find a way to work together in raising their children going forward.

Co-parenting can be very successful for those who are able to communicate with ex-spouses effectively. Unfortunately, not everyone is able to do this, in fact, there are those who cannot have conversations, written or verbal, with an ex-spouse without an argument starting. What can these parents, who both are trying to stay active and involved in their children's lives do?

Parallel parenting is a form of co-parenting that helps parents keep their distance, but keeps everyone in the loop, so to speak. Parents will choose how they will like to communicate with each other, such as via phone, email or text, and generally only facts are included in the shared information. With parallel parenting, each parent also agrees not to interfere with the other's parenting style. This can be difficult to stick to, but in the end, it can reduce stress and anger, making the whole situation easier to handle for parents and children.

For those in New York who are working on child custody agreements, specific instructions for co-parenting may be included in the orders. For example, for those who know that verbally communicating with a spouse may be difficult, adding a stipulation that all communication occur via email or text may be wise. Every couple is different, and every family has unique needs. With assistance, it is possible to create child custody orders and co-parenting plans that fit those needs.

Source: The Huffington Post, "5 Reasons Why Parallel Parenting Is Better Than Co-Parenting", Tiffany Benyacko, Nov. 30, 2015

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